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I do think you should use this spreadsheet as a way to explore what is important to you, what your relationship patterns are, and how much effort you are willing to put into a relationship.

The relationship preferences exploration tool is here.

You should start seeing groups and trends – several people who share a lot of traits. Then on the “Anti-archetypes” tab, make a summary of common things you are attracted to in people you shouldn’t date, and vice versa.

Red flags & Green flags Now go to the “Red flags” tab and start writing down all the qualities or actions that, in retrospect, were a clear sign that you should not date that person.

How to use this spreadsheet: This is a little complicated!